I grew up not knowing a lot about the Bible. I attended church weekly, but never read my Bible. Really, I didn't know that I should. I thought that was just for preachers. I remember as a teenager playing a game of Trivial Pursuit, and receiving this question, "What are the first three words of the Bible?" I had no clue! I gave what I thought was a great guess... "The Holy Bible." I was told that was a good try, but then told the correct answer... "In the beginning." Needless to say, I was embarrassed. It did open my eyes to the fact that I should know more about what is in the Bible. At that point, I started reading the Word of God. Don't you just love the way God uses the everyday, ordinary things to get our attention, and then direct us to where He has plans for us?
I tell you all this, in order to share with you my discovery of the Proverbs 31 Woman. I had been married for several years. Jason and I were active in church. I even taught Sunday School. I thought I had done well at catching up on my Bible knowledge. It was then, that God used a greeting card to open my eyes to the fact that I still had a lot to learn! I was at a grocery store looking for a card of encouragement to send to a friend. I picked up a card that had a portion Proverbs 31:10-31 printed on the front. When I opened it up, the punch line said, "So where are those servant girls?" Yes, that is funny, and truthfully, there have been times I have wished for a few of those servant girls. But more importantly, it left me wondering, was there really a section of the Bible telling me how to be a good wife? I had never heard of such a thing. I went straight home, picked up my Bible and searched out that section of Proverbs. Sure enough, there it was.
Since that time, it has been my desire to become a "virtuous wife", a "wife of worth", a "wife of noble character" ... yes, I have studied this section of scripture in many different versions. I read this passage of scripture daily.
My next several blogs will be going through Proverbs 31 a few verses at a time. Today, I want you to discover this great woman. I am going to include the scripture on here in the New King James version. I am also going to post a commentary on this section from Matthew Henry's Concise Commentary. This commentary helped me when I first started studying Proverbs 31. I keep a printed copy in my Bible, and still refer to it often.
Proverbs 31:10-31
10 Who can find a virtuous wife?
For her worth is far above rubies.
11 The heart of her husband safely trusts her;
So he will have no lack of gain.
12 She does him good and not evil
All the days of her life.
13 She seeks wool and flax,
And willingly works with her hands.
14 She is like the merchant ships,
She brings her food from afar.
15 She also rises while it is yet night,
And provides food for her household,
And a portion for her maidservants.
16 She considers a field and buys it;
From her profits she plants a vineyard.
17 She girds herself with strength,
And strengthens her arms.
18 She perceives that her merchandise is good,
And her lamp does not go out by night.
19 She stretches out her hands to the distaff,
And her hand holds the spindle.
20 She extends her hand to the poor,
Yes, she reaches out her hands to the needy.
21 She is not afraid of snow for her household,
For all her household is clothed with scarlet.
22 She makes tapestry for herself;
Her clothing is fine linen and purple.
23 Her husband is known in the gates,
When he sits among the elders of the land.
24 She makes linen garments and sells them,
And supplies sashes for the merchants.
25 Strength and honor are her clothing;
She shall rejoice in time to come.
26 She opens her mouth with wisdom,
And on her tongue is the law of kindness.
27 She watches over the ways of her household,
And does not eat the bread of idleness.
28 Her children rise up and call her blessed;
Her husband also, and he praises her:
29 “ Many daughters have done well,
But you excel them all.”
30 Charm is deceitful and beauty is passing,
But a woman who fears the LORD, she shall be praised.
31 Give her of the fruit of her hands,
And let her own works praise her in the gates.
Matthew Henry's Concise Commentary
Verses 10 - 31This is the description of a virtuous woman of those days, but the general outlines equally suit every age and nation. She is very careful to recommend herself to her husband's esteem and affection, to know his mind, and is willing that he rule over her. 1. She can be trusted, and he will leave such a wife to manage for him. He is happy in her. And she makes it her constant business to do him good. 2. She is one that takes pains in her duties, and takes pleasure in them. She is careful to fill up time, that none be lost. She rises early. She applies herself to the business proper for her, to women's business. She does what she does, with all her power, and trifles not. 3. She makes what she does turn to good account by prudent management. Many undo themselves by buying, without considering whether they can afford it. She provides well for her house. She lays up for hereafter. 4. She looks well to the ways of her household, that she may oblige all to do their duty to God and one another, as well as to her. 5. She is intent upon giving as upon getting, and does it freely and cheerfully. 6. She is discreet and obliging; every word she says, shows she governs herself by the rules of wisdom. She not only takes prudent measures herself, but gives prudent advice to others. The law of love and kindness is written in the heart, and shows itself in the tongue. Her heart is full of another world, even when her hands are most busy about this world. 7. Above all, she fears the Lord. Beauty recommends none to God, nor is it any proof of wisdom and goodness, but it has deceived many a man who made his choice of a wife by it. But the fear of God reigning in the heart, is the beauty of the soul; it lasts for ever. 8. She has firmness to bear up under crosses and disappointments. She shall reflect with comfort when she comes to be old, that she was not idle or useless when young. She shall rejoice in a world to come. She is a great blessing to her relations. If the fruit be good, the tree must have our good word. But she leaves it to her own works to praise her. Every one ought to desire this honour that cometh from God; and according to this standard we all ought to regulate our judgments. This description let all women daily study, who desire to be truly beloved and respected, useful and honourable. This passage is to be applied to individuals, but may it not also be applied to the church of God, which is described as a virtuous spouse? God by his grace has formed from among sinful men a church of true believers, to possess all the excellences here described.
Saturday, December 31, 2011
Thursday, December 29, 2011
It's Been Awhile
I am sorry that it has been awhile since my last post. I have been working on my priorities, and on my time management. In doing so, I have limited my time on the computer.
During my time away, I have been digging deeper into Proverbs 31:10-31 and in Titus 2:3-5. I will start posting a series of blogs concerning what has been revealed to me in these scriptures. In the mean time, I wanted to share a blog that I have recently discovered, and really love. It is called Time-Warp Wife. I hope you will look it up and enjoy it as much as I do.
http://time-warp-wife.blogspot.com/
During my time away, I have been digging deeper into Proverbs 31:10-31 and in Titus 2:3-5. I will start posting a series of blogs concerning what has been revealed to me in these scriptures. In the mean time, I wanted to share a blog that I have recently discovered, and really love. It is called Time-Warp Wife. I hope you will look it up and enjoy it as much as I do.
http://time-warp-wife.blogspot.com/
Friday, September 23, 2011
What are we Teaching our Daughters?
A few weeks ago, I was preparing supper for friends. As I was peeling potatoes, I thought of something my mama told me when I was young. "You always peel one potato for each person eating, and one for the pot." Now I have no idea why the pot needs a potato, but to this day I always add an extra one. By the way, I usually have plenty of potatoes and very few leftovers... there must be some logic to that hungry pot after all.
Now I realize that this is just a silly helpful hint, but it made consider something else. I use many tips and tidbits that I learned, from my mama and other women, while growing up. Some are important, some I need to lose, and some are just funny memories that make me smile. As I pondered this, I thought what am I passing on to my daughter? Then I thought, what should I be teaching my daughter?
The Bible gives a very clear outline of what older women are to teach younger women in Titus 2:3-5
the older women likewise, that they be reverent in behavior, not slanderers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things— 4 that they admonish the young women to love their husbands, to love their children, 5 to be discreet, chaste, homemakers, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be blasphemed.
It tells us to admonish... so what does that mean? Here is the definition:
Admonish
1 a: to indicate duties or obligations to
b: to express warning or disapproval to especially in a gentle, earnest, or solicitous manner
2: to give friendly earnest advice or encouragement to
Now, in case you missed it in the verses above, here are the 7 things older women should admonish young women to do...
1.Love their husband.
2.Love their children.
3.Be discreet.
4.Be chaste.
5.Be homemakers.
6.Be good.
7.Be obedient to their own husband.
So, I leave you with this question... Is this what we are teaching?
Now I realize that this is just a silly helpful hint, but it made consider something else. I use many tips and tidbits that I learned, from my mama and other women, while growing up. Some are important, some I need to lose, and some are just funny memories that make me smile. As I pondered this, I thought what am I passing on to my daughter? Then I thought, what should I be teaching my daughter?
The Bible gives a very clear outline of what older women are to teach younger women in Titus 2:3-5
the older women likewise, that they be reverent in behavior, not slanderers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things— 4 that they admonish the young women to love their husbands, to love their children, 5 to be discreet, chaste, homemakers, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be blasphemed.
It tells us to admonish... so what does that mean? Here is the definition:
Admonish
1 a: to indicate duties or obligations to
b: to express warning or disapproval to especially in a gentle, earnest, or solicitous manner
2: to give friendly earnest advice or encouragement to
Now, in case you missed it in the verses above, here are the 7 things older women should admonish young women to do...
1.Love their husband.
2.Love their children.
3.Be discreet.
4.Be chaste.
5.Be homemakers.
6.Be good.
7.Be obedient to their own husband.
So, I leave you with this question... Is this what we are teaching?
Saturday, August 6, 2011
I Don't Want to be a Gullible Woman
A few weeks ago, I was reading from 2 Timothy. Here are the first 5 verses of Chapter 3:
1 But know this, that in the last days perilous times will come: 2 For men will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy, 3 unloving, unforgiving, slanderers, without self-control, brutal, despisers of good, 4 traitors, headstrong, haughty, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God, 5 having a form of godliness but denying its power. And from such people turn away!
Now that is pretty powerful, and I believe that it definitely applies to the times we are living in. However, it is the next two verses that has really clung to me.
6 For of this sort are those who creep into households and make captives of gullible women loaded down with sins, led away by various lusts, 7 always learning and never able to come to the knowledge of the truth.
Wow! The first thing I thought was, "Thankfully I am not a gullible woman." I immediately felt God say, "Oh really? Are you sure?" Talk about humbling... there is nothing like being prideful and having God shut you down! Now my first instinct was to argue. I wanted to say that I do not let perilous men like described in the first 5 verses in my house. I am not led away by my lusts. However, I didn't argue. Instead, I asked God to show me how I am being a gullible woman. I wanted to know how I was letting these things creep into my house, how am I being led astray. So, I began watching for God to reveal to me areas in which I need to be more guarded.
This is an ongoing lesson, but here is what I have discerned so far...
The first area that I am letting "perilous men" creep into my house is the television. I like to have some sort of noise going at all times. This stems from growing up as the only child remaining at the home of a divorced mother working shift work. I was home a lot by myself, and therefore wanted noise. To this day, I want the TV or radio on. I may not be paying attention, but the background noise is comforting to me. I am very selective about what channels or stations I have on. However, God showed me that even if it is a "good" station, there could be bad things I am allowing in my house. Now, I am not saying that we will be getting rid our television. I am saying that I will limit (even more closely than before) what is being watched and when. Another side effect of the TV being on all the time, is that both me and my children have a tendency to stop when something on TV catches our eye. It is then that we become idle instead of productive or creative.
The second area that I am letting "perilous men" creep into my house is Facebook. Ouch, yea that one hurt! It is also a little ironic that I will be posting this blog on my facebook page. I don't sit hours in front of the computer creepin on facebook. I do however check it every couple of hours to see what is going on in the lives of others. I would justify this by saying things like, "I may miss a prayer request if I don't check my page regularly." How's that for putting a church spin on things??? I am a keeper of my home. That is what God designed me to be. I can't be a keeper of my home and everybody else's home at the same time. Facebook is good for staying in touch with friends and family. However, do I really need to know that Susie Housecoat took her dog to the vet? Do you really need to know that I went to Wal Mart? I have already started, and will continue to limit my time on facebook. I will not be dropping my facebook account. I will, however, not spend hours each day creepin on my friends. I will not check constantly throughout the day to be sure I haven't missed something. Facebook is another way in which I tend to become idle instead of productive.
Have you noticed that both the television and Facebook create idle time. It is during our idle time, that Satan can come in to decieve. It is then that we can be "led away by our various lusts." In Proverbs 31 God's word gives us a picture of a virtous wife. If you see, she is busy "doing". She is not idle. As a matter of fact in verse 27, it says that she "does not eat the bread of idleness."
When I bow down before Him, I do not want to hear, "Gullible Woman, you allowed perilous men to creep into your house, and you were led astray." Instead, I want to hear, "well done my good and faithful servant."
What about you? Are there areas you are allowing perilous men into your house? Are you being led astray? Ask God to show you where you need to be more guarded.
1 But know this, that in the last days perilous times will come: 2 For men will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy, 3 unloving, unforgiving, slanderers, without self-control, brutal, despisers of good, 4 traitors, headstrong, haughty, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God, 5 having a form of godliness but denying its power. And from such people turn away!
Now that is pretty powerful, and I believe that it definitely applies to the times we are living in. However, it is the next two verses that has really clung to me.
6 For of this sort are those who creep into households and make captives of gullible women loaded down with sins, led away by various lusts, 7 always learning and never able to come to the knowledge of the truth.
Wow! The first thing I thought was, "Thankfully I am not a gullible woman." I immediately felt God say, "Oh really? Are you sure?" Talk about humbling... there is nothing like being prideful and having God shut you down! Now my first instinct was to argue. I wanted to say that I do not let perilous men like described in the first 5 verses in my house. I am not led away by my lusts. However, I didn't argue. Instead, I asked God to show me how I am being a gullible woman. I wanted to know how I was letting these things creep into my house, how am I being led astray. So, I began watching for God to reveal to me areas in which I need to be more guarded.
This is an ongoing lesson, but here is what I have discerned so far...
The first area that I am letting "perilous men" creep into my house is the television. I like to have some sort of noise going at all times. This stems from growing up as the only child remaining at the home of a divorced mother working shift work. I was home a lot by myself, and therefore wanted noise. To this day, I want the TV or radio on. I may not be paying attention, but the background noise is comforting to me. I am very selective about what channels or stations I have on. However, God showed me that even if it is a "good" station, there could be bad things I am allowing in my house. Now, I am not saying that we will be getting rid our television. I am saying that I will limit (even more closely than before) what is being watched and when. Another side effect of the TV being on all the time, is that both me and my children have a tendency to stop when something on TV catches our eye. It is then that we become idle instead of productive or creative.
The second area that I am letting "perilous men" creep into my house is Facebook. Ouch, yea that one hurt! It is also a little ironic that I will be posting this blog on my facebook page. I don't sit hours in front of the computer creepin on facebook. I do however check it every couple of hours to see what is going on in the lives of others. I would justify this by saying things like, "I may miss a prayer request if I don't check my page regularly." How's that for putting a church spin on things??? I am a keeper of my home. That is what God designed me to be. I can't be a keeper of my home and everybody else's home at the same time. Facebook is good for staying in touch with friends and family. However, do I really need to know that Susie Housecoat took her dog to the vet? Do you really need to know that I went to Wal Mart? I have already started, and will continue to limit my time on facebook. I will not be dropping my facebook account. I will, however, not spend hours each day creepin on my friends. I will not check constantly throughout the day to be sure I haven't missed something. Facebook is another way in which I tend to become idle instead of productive.
Have you noticed that both the television and Facebook create idle time. It is during our idle time, that Satan can come in to decieve. It is then that we can be "led away by our various lusts." In Proverbs 31 God's word gives us a picture of a virtous wife. If you see, she is busy "doing". She is not idle. As a matter of fact in verse 27, it says that she "does not eat the bread of idleness."
When I bow down before Him, I do not want to hear, "Gullible Woman, you allowed perilous men to creep into your house, and you were led astray." Instead, I want to hear, "well done my good and faithful servant."
What about you? Are there areas you are allowing perilous men into your house? Are you being led astray? Ask God to show you where you need to be more guarded.
Tuesday, July 19, 2011
Change You Can Count On
Over the last couple of months, God has been working on an area of my life that I need to change. (Today's blog is not about that, although I am sure that there will be a future blog concerning it.) As I was thinking about this change, and how much further I have to go with it, I thought of how many things God has changed in me over the last few years. It was then that I came to a realization... The more time you spend in God's word, the more you change. The more time you spend out of His word, the more you conform to the world. (Some of you have probably known this for a long time, but please remember, sometimes I am slow.)
And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God. Romans 12:2
Through the years, I have come across verses that have opened my eyes to areas in my life where I am out of balance with God's plan for me. Some of these have been easy, even welcome changes. Other times, I have spent weeks, yes even months, studying scripture to be sure I understand the change needed. During that time of study, and for a long time after, the change takes place.
As I look at the world around me, I am sure of one thing... there are a lot of people that are not spending time in God's word. The only way that we are going to be able to change what is around us, is to first be transformed by God. Instead of trying to fix things by the world's standards, we need to be in balance with God's plans for us.
I will leave you with this question, are you seeking God through His word, and accepting the changes He requires? Or are you skimming or even skipping God's word, and living outside of God's plan for you?
Then Jesus said to those Jews who believed Him, “If you abide in My word, you are My disciples indeed. And you shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free.” John 8:31-32
And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God. Romans 12:2
Through the years, I have come across verses that have opened my eyes to areas in my life where I am out of balance with God's plan for me. Some of these have been easy, even welcome changes. Other times, I have spent weeks, yes even months, studying scripture to be sure I understand the change needed. During that time of study, and for a long time after, the change takes place.
As I look at the world around me, I am sure of one thing... there are a lot of people that are not spending time in God's word. The only way that we are going to be able to change what is around us, is to first be transformed by God. Instead of trying to fix things by the world's standards, we need to be in balance with God's plans for us.
I will leave you with this question, are you seeking God through His word, and accepting the changes He requires? Or are you skimming or even skipping God's word, and living outside of God's plan for you?
Then Jesus said to those Jews who believed Him, “If you abide in My word, you are My disciples indeed. And you shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free.” John 8:31-32
Tuesday, July 12, 2011
No Peace When You are Hiding
I have a well meaning family member who often brings my past mistakes up to me. The intention is always to show me a way in which to hide my past. It disturbs this person, that I am not interested in hiding my past mistakes.
I spent years trying to hide, cover, or avoid past sins (both those done to me and done by me). During the years that I tried covering my past, I stayed nervous and fearful. I was constantly afraid that someone would figure out "who" I was. That is all behind me now. God has shown me that I am no longer the things of my past.
I confessed all of it to God, then I let go of it. I cling to 1 John 1:9
But if we confess our sins to him, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all wickedness.
Since I finally let go of my past, I have found a few things to be true: (these are only a few that come to mind as I type, and in no particular order)
*There is no peace when you are hiding.
* Even though you are afraid most people know what you've done,are talking about you and judging you, most people don't know.
* Once you have confessed your sins to God, and changed your actions, people don't care when they find out.
* When you are in the midst of hiding your sin, your imagination is far worse than reality.
* Sin is sin. Even though people may qualify sin, God doesn't. Sin, of any sort, separates us from God. Confession restores our relationship with Him.
* When God prompts me to share my testimony, it has always helped others who are struggling with their past (or current) sins.
* God was not surprised by my choices, and He has used them to mold me into the person I am today.
I have found that living in the light of God is much better than hiding in the dark. If you are caught up in the "hiding" game, I pray that you trust God with whatever it is. Give it to Him, and allow His peace to flow over and through you.
And let the peace that comes from Christ rule in your hearts. For as members of one body you are called to live in peace. And always be thankful. Colossians 3:15
I spent years trying to hide, cover, or avoid past sins (both those done to me and done by me). During the years that I tried covering my past, I stayed nervous and fearful. I was constantly afraid that someone would figure out "who" I was. That is all behind me now. God has shown me that I am no longer the things of my past.
I confessed all of it to God, then I let go of it. I cling to 1 John 1:9
But if we confess our sins to him, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all wickedness.
Since I finally let go of my past, I have found a few things to be true: (these are only a few that come to mind as I type, and in no particular order)
*There is no peace when you are hiding.
* Even though you are afraid most people know what you've done,are talking about you and judging you, most people don't know.
* Once you have confessed your sins to God, and changed your actions, people don't care when they find out.
* When you are in the midst of hiding your sin, your imagination is far worse than reality.
* Sin is sin. Even though people may qualify sin, God doesn't. Sin, of any sort, separates us from God. Confession restores our relationship with Him.
* When God prompts me to share my testimony, it has always helped others who are struggling with their past (or current) sins.
* God was not surprised by my choices, and He has used them to mold me into the person I am today.
I have found that living in the light of God is much better than hiding in the dark. If you are caught up in the "hiding" game, I pray that you trust God with whatever it is. Give it to Him, and allow His peace to flow over and through you.
And let the peace that comes from Christ rule in your hearts. For as members of one body you are called to live in peace. And always be thankful. Colossians 3:15
Sunday, July 10, 2011
Where is the Modesty?
Okay, I am just going to go ahead and jump off into this... Every summer, I dread seeing all the beach pictures on facebook. Don't get me wrong, I love to see the ocean, the sand, and all the cool family photos. What I hate is all the girls that feel they need to post pics of themselves in bikinis... And let's face it, it is not just the beach wear that lacks a little in the material department. I truly cannot understand why girls (of all ages) feel they have to show off everything that God gave them. Even at church this morning, I found myself appalled by some of the apparel. I often find myself asking the question, Where is the Modesty?
While studying modesty in scripture, I came across a commentary by Andrew Wommack on the scripture 1 Timothy 2:9. I want to share it with you now. (You can go to awmi.net for further commentary or more information on Andrew Wommack.)
1 Timothy 2:9
In like manner also, that women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with shamefacedness and sobriety; not with braided hair, or gold, or pearls, or costly array;
Note 1 at 1 Tim. 2:9: Paul had just admonished men to be holy, without wrath and doubting. In a similar way, he now instructs women how to behave.
Note 2 at 1 Tim. 2:9: There is much contention over what "modest" is. What is acceptable dress in one culture is offensive in another. What is modest in one era would be considered risque in another. Yet, despite the hazards of trying to define modesty, the scriptures demand that we make an attempt.
Our English word "modest" comes from a Latin word meaning "moderate." This is significant because it means that the word "modest" is promoting the idea of being moderate. Whatever the culture or styles of the day, a modest person is one who will not embrace the extreme. Those who embrace styles and fashions that differ from their culture's norms, are usually not modest.
Therefore, it is appropriate to at least partially define modesty by a comparison to those around us. The attitude of "who cares what others think. I'm an individual. I march to my own drum," is an extreme and selfish attitude that violates modesty. A person can become extreme on opposite ends of the spectrum. Those who hold to the styles of the 1700's, in an attempt to be modest, are also extreme.
So, moderation is one of the key elements of modesty. Paul goes on to reveal that immodesty puts an undue emphasis on the external looks while true godliness places the importance on the hidden man of the heart.
Note 3 at 1 Tim. 2:9: Peter makes a similar statement about the dress of women, in 1 Peter 3:3-5 (see parallel Scriptures). In this passage, Peter mentions the way the hair is fixed, wearing gold, and the type of apparel.
Some people have interpreted these passages to say that women cannot braid their hair, wear gold, pearls, or expensive clothing. However, that's missing the point. The way Peter stated it in 1 Peter 3:3, was that women were not suppose to put on apparel. Does that mean they aren't suppose to wear clothes? Certainly not!
The point is that the emphasis should not be on how we look outwardly. In both passages, the instructions on dress are followed by the revelation that it is the inner person who makes one beautiful. That is repeated other places in scripture. Proverbs 19:22 says, "Kindness makes a man attractive. . ." (LB). This is the true beauty of a Christian.
Each person has a desire to be attractive. This need should be fulfilled by our conduct and good works, not by our outward appearance. Gold, pearls and expensive clothing can be worn, but the admonition is not to be gaudy with these things. Let your true beauty come from your heart, which is hidden.
Note 4 at 1 Tim. 2:9: Costly is a relative term. Some garments that might be considered cheap in the United States might be worth a year's wages in some third world countries. Therefore, just as with the word "modest" (see note 2 at this verse), "moderation" is a key word in describing what costly means. Our dress should be appropriate to the situation and culture where we live.
While studying modesty in scripture, I came across a commentary by Andrew Wommack on the scripture 1 Timothy 2:9. I want to share it with you now. (You can go to awmi.net for further commentary or more information on Andrew Wommack.)
1 Timothy 2:9
In like manner also, that women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with shamefacedness and sobriety; not with braided hair, or gold, or pearls, or costly array;
Note 1 at 1 Tim. 2:9: Paul had just admonished men to be holy, without wrath and doubting. In a similar way, he now instructs women how to behave.
Note 2 at 1 Tim. 2:9: There is much contention over what "modest" is. What is acceptable dress in one culture is offensive in another. What is modest in one era would be considered risque in another. Yet, despite the hazards of trying to define modesty, the scriptures demand that we make an attempt.
Our English word "modest" comes from a Latin word meaning "moderate." This is significant because it means that the word "modest" is promoting the idea of being moderate. Whatever the culture or styles of the day, a modest person is one who will not embrace the extreme. Those who embrace styles and fashions that differ from their culture's norms, are usually not modest.
Therefore, it is appropriate to at least partially define modesty by a comparison to those around us. The attitude of "who cares what others think. I'm an individual. I march to my own drum," is an extreme and selfish attitude that violates modesty. A person can become extreme on opposite ends of the spectrum. Those who hold to the styles of the 1700's, in an attempt to be modest, are also extreme.
So, moderation is one of the key elements of modesty. Paul goes on to reveal that immodesty puts an undue emphasis on the external looks while true godliness places the importance on the hidden man of the heart.
Note 3 at 1 Tim. 2:9: Peter makes a similar statement about the dress of women, in 1 Peter 3:3-5 (see parallel Scriptures). In this passage, Peter mentions the way the hair is fixed, wearing gold, and the type of apparel.
Some people have interpreted these passages to say that women cannot braid their hair, wear gold, pearls, or expensive clothing. However, that's missing the point. The way Peter stated it in 1 Peter 3:3, was that women were not suppose to put on apparel. Does that mean they aren't suppose to wear clothes? Certainly not!
The point is that the emphasis should not be on how we look outwardly. In both passages, the instructions on dress are followed by the revelation that it is the inner person who makes one beautiful. That is repeated other places in scripture. Proverbs 19:22 says, "Kindness makes a man attractive. . ." (LB). This is the true beauty of a Christian.
Each person has a desire to be attractive. This need should be fulfilled by our conduct and good works, not by our outward appearance. Gold, pearls and expensive clothing can be worn, but the admonition is not to be gaudy with these things. Let your true beauty come from your heart, which is hidden.
Note 4 at 1 Tim. 2:9: Costly is a relative term. Some garments that might be considered cheap in the United States might be worth a year's wages in some third world countries. Therefore, just as with the word "modest" (see note 2 at this verse), "moderation" is a key word in describing what costly means. Our dress should be appropriate to the situation and culture where we live.
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